“Like, no eggs?”
Same reaction every time I tell someone “oh, yeah it’s meatless spaghetti”, or it’s “tofu steak”. Or on certain days when I decide to bring in salad, which elicits the usual “she’s eating grass again!” from my precious coworkers.
“I have problems with my body image and I feel compelled to not eat meat – or anything at all – for, like, ever,” I would then reply in my best April Ludgate voice.
Clearly, I don’t have a problem with meat, given the fact that I ate an entire year’s worth in under three days in Vietnam. I also don’t have body dysmorphia. Not an extreme case, anyway. I do, however, have a very unique living situation which compels me to go lacto-vegetarian on certain days.
“Don’t you feel weak after?”
Only if you eat wheatgrass for five days straight.
Contrary to popular belief, I have come to learn through the wise teachings of a sagacious so-and-so that I live with (whom we shall name Mrs Y from here onward) that you can have a balanced vegetarian diet, but you can also put on weight when you’re vegetarian. Mrs Y is mostly vegetarian, but she can cook and bake delicious things that can cause a 10kg spike in weight. Case in point, I sort of forced this fantastic eggless chocolate cake recipe out of her secret cupboard.
“But eggless cakes will never be the same as egg-filled ones”
Sometimes they might taste even better. Boo yah.
Mrs Y’s Eggless Mini Chocolate Cakes
1 cup self-raising flour
½ cup cocoa powder
Pinch of salt
½ tbsp sodium bicarbonate
1 cup milk
1 cup sugar (or less)
½ cup corn oil
2 tbsp white vinegar
1/4 bag of Hershey’s semisweet chocolate chips
Handful of crushed almonds
Before you begin, always grease your cupcake tin or holders with some butter or oil. Preheat the oven to 180 degrees Celsius.
- Combine milk, sugar and corn oil in a mixing bowl. Microwave for 30 seconds til the milk gets warm.
- Stir in the sugar until it dissolves.
- Sift flour, salt, sodium bicarbonate and cocoa powder in a separate mixing bowl.
- Slowly fold in the dry ingredients into the wet. A delicious brown goopy mixture will form. Make sure all the lumps are gone. I recommend using an electric beater.
- Fold in the vinegar. A lighter brown mixture will begin to appear, but don’t freak out: it’s just chemistry. Acid + sodium bicarbonate = carbon dioxide, thus releasing air bubbles into your mixture, thus substituting nicely for egg whites.
- Spoon the mixture into the tin. Bake at 180 for 20-25 minutes until the insides are done.
Best served with cold milk at midnight.